My Early Retirement Journey This Week:
Monday – I started the workday relatively fine. Today was a 9.5 hour shift. I despise it, but it affords me the opportunity to do my side hustle so I have to remember to be thankful for them accommodating me. I was fine when I got there. I helped train a new employee. What do you think about people who make snarky comments and hide them as jokes? I don’t care for them. I held my tongue for most of the day as it didn’t really hit me until that night. Work politics are annoying. I look forward to the day that I don’t have to deal with it. I wish that day were now. By the time I left work, I was congested and had the beginnings of a headache. I attribute my symptoms to either a 9 minute walk outside on a high pollen count day or chemical irritants in the cube I was sitting in today to train the new employee. Argh. Work makes me physically ill sometimes.
Tuesday – Today I worked 6 hours at my day job and then went to my night side hustle (a teaching gig). Students were fine. Most of them showed up. A few of them came with excuses on why their work was late. I have to do something about that. At my day job, there was quite a bit of hullabaloo about one of the calls. People were talking about me in a way I didn’t care for. It was annoying. It’s mostly annoying not being able to speak up for yourself or be heard. Can’t say I’m too surprised. I want to say people I thought more of were taking part but I don’t really think that much of anyone I work with so that really just affirms my position. It turns out they were wrong and I was right but they still think they were right because I couldn’t say anything. It’s so annoying!
Healthwise, I was blowing my nose all day. It was a pretty miserable day. By the time I got home, I had a fever of 100.6*F. I took 2 Ibuprofen, ate some Ramen with fried pepper, and went to bed.
Wednesday – Woke up feeling a bit better. Temperature back to normal. Today is another 9.5 hour shift at my day job. Not feeling like eating much. My tooth hurts. There is a hole in my crown. I had an endodontic retreatment the day I returned to work after my surgery, and I think the filling they put in there has either fallen out or partially fallen out. Now my mouth hurts more. Internet down when I got home so I stared at the wall since I don’t have cable right now. Did some dishes. Washed some bedding… I probably did that Monday night though.
Thursday – I did go to work today eventhough I couldn’t sleep through the night. I think work is making me physically ill. I might need a new mattress. Sometimes my neck hurts; sometimes my back hurts; I wake up with fingers and arms that have fallen asleep. I don’t know if it’s my mattress or a psychosomatic response to work. I know not what exactly I want to do when I ever reach FIRE, but health and wellness is definitely at the top of that list. I can’t let go of the feeling about some of my co-workers; I feel betrayed somehow. I do my best to leave everyone alone but sometimes it feels like they try to ostracize or judge me but in a passive in-ostensible way. I understand now why some people hate high school. If this is what it was like for them, I would have hated it too.
Thursdays are usually my errand day but I only had to get dishwasher tabs and some produce. I didn’t want to make two stops, so I just went to Kroger. I probably overpaid for the dishwasher tabs at Kroger but Walmart doesn’t sell lottery tickets and I buy lottery tickets for our small office pool on Thursdays. I also got some Zaxby’s. One chicken nugget fell on the floor when I got home… I still ate it 😄. Ate 3 spring Oreos, flossed, brushed, and went to bed.
Friday – Woke up with tongue hurting. There is a small white bump on it. Compound that with my ongoing respiratory symptoms: my nose is running; my chest is congested; coughing productively with colored sputum. Don’t forget still recovering from surgery. It’s not a great day. This is either motivation or discouragement for FIRE. Motivation to keep going so one day I won’t have to work when my body needs time to heal. Discouragement that I still have so long to go. Why am I wasting my youth preparing for old age. I haven’t fully reconciled that. Add to this also, the ongoing silent drama at work, being passed over for a promotion (more on that later). The hole in my tooth; ongoing jaw pain; constipation and abdominal pain. God, do you hate me?